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 Smile Please

A guy goes to the doctor.
Guy: "Doc, I think I broke my arm in three places."
Doctor: "Well, don't go to those places!"

My doctor says she's been practicing medicine for ten years...
I asked her to call me when she's done practicing and gets serious

Lady (to her doctor): "What l am worried about is my height and not my weight."
Doctor: "How come?"

Lady: "According to my weight, my height should be 7 feet, 8 inches."

An engineer and a psychiatrist meet up for their 20th college reunion.
The engineer says, "I'm surprised to see you still looking so young. I'd have thought listening to people's problems all day would have given you a mass of wrinkles."

The psychiatrist says, "You think we listen?"

 

A patient at my daughter’s medical clinic filled out a form. After Name and Address, the next question was "Nearest Relative." She wrote "Walking distance."

A famous doctor was being interviewed the news media. Looking to spice things up a little, one reporter asked if the doctor had ever made any serious mistakes.
“Well, yes,” the doctor sighed. “I once cured a multimillionaire.”
“How was that a mistake? The reporter asked.

The doctor shook his head wearily. “I did it in one visit!”

 

Q: How do you know you can't trust doctors and lawyers?

A: Because they both "practice" their professions.

 

Medical student was asked...
... if there is nuclear weapon attack
... who will survive ...???
?
?
?
Ans - SLE patients... because they have antinuclear antibodies sir.

Mysterious Math

How do you arrange the number 8 three times in a row so that the answer is 9?
Answer: 8+(8/8)=9

Trick: Any Number

Step1: Come up with any number.
Step2: Multiply this figure by 3.
Step3: Add 45 to the solution.
Step4: Multiply the number by 2.
Step5: Divide the result by 6.
Step6: Minus the first number you have come up with with the last number. 
The Answer will be Number 15.

Guess the Age

Step1: Think or write your age on the paper (e.g. age is 35).
Step2: Add 90 to your age (i.e. 35 + 90 = 125).
Step3: Write the last two digits of the above answer (here, 25).
Step4: Add 1 to the above number (as, 25 + 1 = 26).
Step5: If you add 9 to the above answer you will get the age of the user (here, 26 + 9 = 35).

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